Too Much Horror Business!

+++Happy Halloweenie!+++

Who doesn't like a good horror movie? Okay, so loads of people don't. But i do, and this is my blog, bro. Seriously, I spend most of my time on Halloween watching horror movies and listening to punk rock. So here is a list (complete with Youtube links to the full movies) to some of my favorite horror flicks! Enjoy and......as The Misfits say, BEWARE!

Trick Or Treat
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=33nGwh0ADIA
With a cameo by Ozzy Osbourne playing the part of a TV evangelist, Trick or Treat is a cool film about a young metalhead who is crushed after his idol has died. When he aquires the acetate of Sammi Curr's new record from a sympathetic friend, Gene Simmons no less!, he gets more than he bargained for! When playing the record backwards, he hears the voice of his idol-speaking directly from the grave!

Dolls
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1v0TMGFRpgQ
A great film about a family who find a house, owned by an odd couple, to take refuge in- after their car has broken down on a stormy night. Much like many 'haunted house' flicks/books, others soon find themselves in the same predicament. In 'Dolls' case we have some lame 80's new wave/punkettes with terrible Bwitish acciints and a bumbling goofball 'Ralph Morris'.
Soon, murders are happening...and it all leads to the dolls that the eccentric owner creates.

Clownhouse
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7tv6VoOYok4
Although the film will forever be plagued with the directors alleged molestation of the youngest cast member, Clownhouse is a decent clown based horror romp. Three brothers are left alone for Halloween night, at the same time, a group of mental-cases have escaped their asylum, killed some clowns, and taken their uniforms. As expected, the two worlds collide, teenage boys being stalked by killer 'clowns'.

Basketcase
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xsGZyilpLb8
A personal favorite, Basketcase! This is one absolutely bonkers flick about a boy, Duane, who moves to the city. The strange thing is, he always carries a straw box around. Well, it turns out that in this box is his 'twin' brother, who was separated at an early age by some dodgy surgeons. The 'twin', Belial, is a large tumour-like creature with a face and arms. Jealous of his 'normal' looking brother, Belial gets Duane to find the dodgy surgeons who split them up so that they can take care of them. But, his murderous jealously hits breaking point when Duane forms a relationship with a local nurse!

Braindead
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F9SJP27mR1g
Before Peter Jackson became known as the 'Lord of the Rings' director, he directed many low-budget films such as the fantastic 'The Frighteners', 'Bad Taste', and this gore-tastic gem, 'Braindead'. A 'rat-monkey' gets taken from its native 'Skull Island' and put in an Australian zoo. Our main character, Lionel, becomes 'romantically entangled' with a local Mexican woman. While on a date, Lionel's controlling mother follows him to the zoo where she gets bitten by the 'rat-monkey' and becomes a zombie-like creature that starts to infect the unfortunates that enter her house.
For the majority of the film Lionel is hiding and tranquilizing these zombies in his house, until the body count becomes too much after an unexpected party...where the bloodbath begins.

+++Happy Halloween+++

+++I Can't Wait To Hear You Scream!+++

The Misfits - Evilive 7' 1982

The legendary live recording by one of the greatest bands of all time, The Misfits!
Here we have seven tracks of classic, horror themed, punk rock. This is a sloppy, fast, and most importantly, rad recording. Released in 1982, we have a good mix between fan favorites 'Astro Zombies', 'Horror Business', '20 Eyes', and some lesser known stuff like, my personal favorite, 'We Are 138', 'Night Of The Living Dead', and 'All Hell Breaks Loose'. If that isn't awesome enough, Henry Rollins does his 'thing' in the epic closer 'We Are 138'!

Link:
http://www47.zippyshare.com/v/92239401/file.html

+++You Don't Go In The Bathroom With Me+++

+++We Are 138+++

The Misfits - Noise The Show, WNYU 10/23/81

A pretty rad oddity here, The Misfits on Noise The Show, WNYU 10-23-1981
This is a promotional unveiling of their, then, new song 'Halloween', a couple cuts from the 'Horror Business' days 'Who Killed Marilyn' and the original 'Where Eagles Dare'.

While the host has a slightly grating voice, at least we have some banter, promotional shizz, and some mentions of other bands who's track were played (but cut out of this recording).

Direct Download Link:
http://www.mediafire.com/?l5bzgm0tmb2

Your Skull Is My Bowl Blog:
http://yourskullismybowl.blogspot.co.uk/2009/11/noise-show-misfits-11-23-1981.html

The Misfits - Uncle Floyd Show 10/31/80

This is an interesting recording from a radio show broadcasted on Halloween day 1980.
What we have is lo-fi live recordings of 'Halloween' and 'Vampira' with an interview splatted inbetween. The interview is a bit nothing, just talking about about a show and their upcoming record.
So, while you wont be missing out on much, this is a cool little oddity in the minefield of Misfits bootlegs.

Link:
http://www78.zippyshare.com/v/83139735/file.html

The Misfats EP

The Misfats are/were a hilarious 'fat themed' Misfits tribute act. As you can guess, all member are 'phat'...as well as 'fat'. Just looking at the song titles puts me into giggles. Some great ones are: 'Hungry Moments', 'Don't Open That Mayonaise', and 'Mommy, Can I Go Out & Grill Tonight?'

Sound wise, theres not much to say. You like the Misfits? you like sloppy 'live' recordings?, do you have a sense of humor? Plus, i defy anyone not to find 'Butter' anything less than hilarious!

Direct Link:

http://share.myflare.com/kBCktj

Dr. Drunk Ruins It For Everyone Blog:

http://drdrunkruinsitforeveryone.blogspot.co.uk/2014/10/the-misfats-misfits-tribute-ep.html

Official Website

http://www.misfats.com/home.php

+++Waddle Among Us+++

Cultfinder 'Black Thrashing Terror' EP 2012

Unholy Metalpunk at it's most blasphemous!

If you're a tea drinking, yellow teethed, limey bugger, I urge you to support this band. Their debut 7' 'Black Thrashing Terror' (which also comes with a cool patch and small poster/lyric sheet) is only £2.40 fer christ sake! and their full length CD is £4.00. So you can't say 'that's toooo expensive!' when p&p is like a quid or so.

Anyway...
Cultfinder play a really unique style of Black Metal. It's a bit 1st wave (Bathory, Venom, Voor), it's a bit Norweigian (Darkthrone, Burzum, Mayhem), it's a bit Brazillian deathrash (Chakal, Witchhammer), it's a bit 3rd wave (Abigail, Nifelheim), and it's also a bit crusty!

This is some lo-fi, fast, blasty, raspy-vocalled shit. 'Black Thrashing Terror' opens with a swampy, doom-bringing riff-accompanied by thudding tom-toms, which quickly erupts into unholy rasping vocals, blasting drums, and racing guitars. The chorus is where it's really at, in the vein of Abigail, we have a catchy refrain of 'BLACK! THRASHING! TERROR!' while the guitars continue to pump out blasphemous riffs.

'Archangel Burial' continues in the fast and blasty vein, while 'Witching Curse' is a rad tune that fluctuates from the fast and blasty sections to the ominous, helltanik chorus riff. And lest we forget that punishing double-kick drumming that plays under the chorus riff half way through.

Black Thrashing Terror
Heretic winds of torment, lies beyond compare
Blasphemous hordes lie dormant
For war we shall prepare!

Call to the hordes of devastation!
blasphemous cries our incantation
Call to the hordes of devastation!
Blaphemous cries: we rise!

BLACK! THRASHING! TERROR!

Towards the infernal darkness
Bastards of Belial
Hordes of blackened martyrs

Earth we shall defile!

Because I'm such a nice guy, here's the download link
http://www71.zippyshare.com/v/82672493/file.html

And in the name Satan, go buy some merch from:

http://unholycultfinder.bandcamp.com/merch

http://unholycultfinder.bandcamp.com/album/black-thrashing-terror

Fat Kid Running 2004 (Skate Punk)

                                                 Example: An actual fat kid running


The wonders of the modern age! After asking about on 'teh interwebz', I finally found someone who has the Fat Kid Running EP. Fat Kid Running were a Cali Skate Punk band, and while they were not ground-breaking, they write some great, catchy, poppy punk tunes.

There is something strange about certain genres having their own 'place' in time. Maybe i'm weird, well...okay, i am weird, but modern skate punk bands doesn't do much for me. However, for some reason, some no-name, obscure band from the early 00's pop-punk/skate boom interests me.

Anyway, this band is pretty cool. It's like NOFX and No Use For A Name got dumped by their hoe-ass-bish's, listened to Hopesfall, came to the conclusion that life isn't all fun and games and decided to start playing minor chords a lot more. Throughout the record you will hear 'Fat Wreck' drumming, morose melodies, octave chords, cool riffs that sometimes harmonize, 'serious'/sad clean guitars, and melodic-i suppose 'whiny' vocals.

If you're looking for a 'fun' sounding band, maybe give these guys a miss. While on their official page it seems silly and fun, their actual sound is relatively down-beat. With that said, there are some good up-beat moments as well, so it's not all mondo-depresso.

Direct Download link:
http://www.mediafire.com/download/jbu3z8ijzewozde/Fat_Kid_Running_-_Fat_Kid_Running_(2004).rar

You can also find the download link at the great 'Skate Punk Memories' blog here:
http://skatepunkmemories.blogspot.co.uk/2014/10/fat-kid-running-fat-kid-running-2004.html

Official Website:

https://web.archive.org/web/20030627094454/http://www.fatkidrunning.com/index.htm

FUCK! (It's Pronounced SHIT!)

FUCK! are an eloquently named punk band/project from Edinburgh, Scotland, being a side-project of the Murderburgers.

Musically, expect hardcore like speed but with more traditional 'punk rock' chord progressions and a good use of melody. Usually new hardcore bands don't really strike me as that interesting unless they are doing something different or are notably extreme, FUCK! offers a melodic edge that even fans of pop punk may be interested in. One thing that i find really cool is that all the songs are remarkably short; their first EP is over in no more than 4 minutes and their second clocking in at around 7 minutes.

Now, talking about each song is probably a stupid idea since they are over in a matter of seconds.
So I'll just let some song titles do the talking for me.

Tuesday Morning Staring Match With A  Dog
A Sorry Excuse For A Song Hiding Behind A Long And Witty Title
My Therapist Looks Like A Wizard
It's Not The Size Of Your Penis That Matters, It's How Big It Is

Both EP's are officially 'free' (optional to donate) to download from their Bandcamp page.
http://itspronouncedshityouidiot.bandcamp.com/album/its-pronounced-shit-ep

I am now a man

On the 18th June 2014 I became a man.

Orchid. Chaos Is Me. First Press. Ebullition Records. w/Lyric Insert.

After years of hailing the altar of Orchid I finally managed to get this at a decent price. For those not in the know, Orchid were a screamy-ass punk band from Massachusetts, USA who had a dab-hand in molding the sound of 'Screamo' along with other groups on labels such as Ebullition, Gravity, and Level Plane, just to name the biggest labels.

In related news, I also got a first press of One Eyed God Prophecy's self-titled record from 1995 w/poster.

As well as the Swing Kids/Spanakorzo split from 1995 w/insert.

And Just to show off, I also got some early-mid 90's 'emo' 7's

.Impetus Inter - Youth Jihad EP 1995

.Union Young America - Kill The Man In Everything w/insert 1995

.Heroin - self-titled w/Gravity catalog insert & lyrics insert 1992

.The Mandela Strikeforce - The Sound Of The Revolution in Stereo w/insert 1995

Not to mention all the other records and CD's I've bought throughout this year!

Client - Trap Flexi 1988 (Japcore)

Client was an obscure hardcore/crossover-ish type band from Japan whose sole release is this record that came out in 1988. What you can expect is terrible recording quality and decent, occasionally ambitious, hardcore.

What’s nice is that they change it up in terms of tempo and structure, so it doesn’t all sound the same.While they don’t bombard you with super-aggressive Japcore ala G.A.I. or Confuse, they do have some dynamic shifts that make this worth a listen if you’re a big Japcore freak. The biggest detriment to this EP, and this is strange to say regarding Japcore, is the shitty production. While a band such as G.A.I. make the terrible production suit their noisy brand of punk, Client have a more ambitious sound that could have benefitted by slightly better production that brings the guitars to the fore and lessens the overly bass-y mix.

Trap probably wasn’t the best song to start this off, with a Discharge meets U.S. hardcore type riff and a short but sweet guitar solo, this track is surprisingly overpowered by the bass, which is one problem that plagues the whole record.

The next track has a Japanese title, setting off much like the previous song, the track eventually slows down for a catchy chord progression followed by a tasty guitar solo, only to erupt back into warp-speed moments later.

The third track also has a Japanese title and it shows a change in direction, with some nice stop/start moments, guitar leads, a catchy chorus, and a cool moshy riff towards the end, this track shows that Client are fairly ambitious, making it one of the best tracks here.

Oi! Are the title suggest has an Oi! vibe during the opening, however, the track then goes into typical hardcore pace. The mid-point shows off a catchy riff and some nice, if slightly out-of-tune, leads.

Not Console sets of with a mid-tempo Thrash metal style riff, which carries the song through the 3 and a half minutes, making this the longest track by far. The mid-point shows off some decent guitar playing that grabs the interest, showing that there certainly is some talent here. This is probably the best song on the whole flexi as it shows the ambitious nature of the band off.

Fox is the final track which has a nice balance between hardcore speed as well as some slower, catchy chord progressions. The unexpected change in pace towards the end is a rad touch, yet again showing that they are a tight unit.

So, not an essential listen by any stretch of the imagination, but, if you are interested in Japanese punk, I’d suggest downloading this rare nugget.

Download 

http://www16.zippyshare.com/v/12321833/file.html

Freax - Fuckin' Whore 1987 (Crossover Thrash)

Freax - Fuckin' Whore

Heres an obscurity, Freax, a Crossover band from Germany who only released this demo in 1987.
This is some crude, stupid, immature, and above-all, awesome shizz.

Musically, this is pretty decent, badly recorded, and badly played Crossover Thrash. None of the songs even make it to the 2 minute mark, however, the tracks are packed-full of mosh-riffage and thrashin' fast chugs. Vocally, it's typical snotty punk, which works well over the metal riffs.

Kicking off the demo we have Fuckin' Whore which is a good mix between hardcore, speedy-thrash-chugging, and mosh riffs. Lyrically, it's pretty fucking stupid, however, towards the end there is a wonderfully shitty guitar solo. So that makes up for it.

Fuckin' In The Stars has a phaser effect on the guitar, which basically gives a 'jet' sound....ehhh, you'll know it when you hear it. The track flip-flops from phaser guitars to treble-y crossover riffs. During the phaser moments the bass can be heard in all it's glory, playing generic 'thrash' riffs, which is nice.

Snot Hanging Brown is very hardcore, the fast parts remind me of Phillipines hardcore like Banned, we also have some mid tempo chugging while a sloppy solo takes place. Definatly my favourite track here, the vocals are of particular merit, totally snotty punk.

After is pretty much a sloppy thrash song, i'm not sure if it's suppose to be discordant and out of time...but it is. Apart from the heavy riff in the second half, this is the weakest track by far.

Halter is probably the best played track here, the transitions are pretty good, going from sloppy crossover to tight mid-tempo thrash riffs. Overall, a decent tune.

By no means is this an essential listen, but, if you like your Crossover leaning on the punk side with
some bad-ass mosh riffs and juvinile lyrics, this is recommended for you.

Download
http://www51.zippyshare.com/v/37278591/file.html

Child Abuse - Bring It! (Mutha Records 1983)

Child Abuse seem to be another obscure hardcore punk group who released one record and then dropped off the face of the planet. Based in New Jersey, which had a knack for offensive punk bands, they only released this 7’. Musically, this is pretty much very lo-fi U.S. hardcore. If you are a fan of the more 'thrash' sound, such as early D.R.I. as well as the more straight-up punk rock-bordering on hardcore styles of the Adolescents, you may dig this.

The self-titled track has what would become a stereotypical 'pop punk' chord progression, albeit completely out of tune. With a scratchy lo-fi guitar sound, funny lyrics, and a good use of melody, this Is a pretty rad track.

Live Too Fast and Life of Them are typical hardcore tracks, and that my friends, is a great, great thing.

I'm Lazy, dear lord. THIS. IS. AMAZING. From the morose and out of tune intro to the hellish cacophony of screamy vocals and fast as shit guitar playing, this tune is fucking rad.

E.S.T. takes another typical hardcore approach, with the mid paced, more punk rock verse and a fast as shit hardcore chorus.

We Don't Want You Hanging Around is yet another fast hardcore track but it does have some great vocals towards the end!

Unfortunately, you'll have to download each track separately. First world problems are a bitch, ain't they?

Child Abuse

http://www.divshare.com/download/11040134-980

Live Too Fast

http://www.divshare.com/download/11040135-d8f

Life of Them

http://www.divshare.com/download/11040136-228

I'm Lazy

http://www.divshare.com/download/11040137-197

E.S.T.

http://www.divshare.com/download/11040138-c4a

We Don't Want You Hanging Around

http://www.divshare.com/download/11040140-f12

"My hairs a mess, I smell like shit, you burnt my legs and you cut my wrists, burnt my skin, destroyed my mind"

SIEGE - Drop Dead

SEIGE were a hardcore punk band from Boston who played astonishingly fast for their time. This EP was recorded in 1984, basically on the tail end of hardcore's initial lifespan. I've heard people mumble about Grindcore when SIEGE are mentioned, possibly down to the huge influence they had on Napalm Death and Repulsion. From how i see it, this is particularly fast hardcore, no metal riffs here, possibly apart from Grim Reaper but then again i'd consider that Flipper worship as opposed to heavy metal.

The vocals are borderline screamy, which is always really cool to hear from this era of punk. If your a fan of thrash (as in fast hardcore) or power-violence you will probably eat this right up! If you like your hardcore melodic and catchy, this may not be your sort of thing, but, then again, there's no harm in trying. Now go fucking listen to it, dick.

Drop Dead is an insanely fast track with screamy vocals right from the get go.
You can definitely see the influence these guys had on power-violence and grindcore.

Conform has a Black Flag vibe to it, you know, very heavy and kinda 'wastey'.
If this song was a person, it would stagger into your nearest pub, puke on your girlfriend, beat you up and after that, publicly masturbate in front of a children s school...during recess, and not give a single fuck at all.
This track flip flops from the heavy Flag-like main riff to blasty hardcore. Fucking rad, maaaaaaan.

Life of Hate is one of the shortest tracks here and is typical hardcore. Not much else to say really.... urhm....how's your day been, bro?

Starvation is yet again a short hardcore track with a sloppy solo and a nice bass lead section.

Armageddon is the shortest track here and it's absolutely punishing! Aside from constant blasting we get a small break in which we get one of those bass interludes that are so popular with power-violence bands nowadays.

Walls is probably the closest to 'conventional' hardcore. Almost sounding like 'is This My World' era Jerry's Kids at moments.

Sad But True, no not the boring Metallica song from the early 90's, this is hardcore with savage vocals. And who can forget that sloppy-ass guitar solo!

Cold War opens with a d-beat and then opens the floodgates of U.S hardcore in typical SIEGE style. Did I mention it has a d-beat?

Grim Reaper is one mean-ass song, very Flipper-like with it's repetitive, slow bass line and noise guitar playing. On top of that, there is a saxophone playing free-form solos over the top, ala Sex Bomb. Vocally there are obvious delay and reverb effects, which makes the guttural pre-death metal vocals sound insane; like looking inside a tortured persons head. If the Flipper comparison isn't enough, the track length is the best part of 7 minutes...Holy fudge.

Direct Link
http://www78.zippyshare.com/v/73047754/file.html

Cut & Paste Blog
http://cutnpasteyoface.blogspot.co.uk/2014/05/siege.html

High Treason - Saturday Night Special

At least in my opinion, this is one of the best ‘NWOBHM’ songs, or should I just say Heavy Metal songs since how could there be a 'New Wave of' if there was never an ‘old wave’ to begin with? Some people consider Black Sabbath as metal, I love Sabbath, I really do, but c'mon, they’re more heavy rock than anything else. Anyway, this is irrelevant and controversial...

High Treason seem to be another one of those metal bands cropping up in the late 70's/early 80's, you know the type, releasing a few 7's or demos, possibly an LP if they were lucky. In High Treason’s case, they only released this single in their heyday.  As far as I know they are back together, but I have no idea what they sound like now (edit 06/4/15: they sound pretty rad). What I do know is that ‘Saturday Night Special’ is an amazing tune! If you like 77' punk it won't be too hard getting into this. With a relatively short length, good solos, a powerful voice, fantastic choruses, cool chord progressions and to top it all off, played fairly speedy, I don’t see how you couldn't like it.

The B-side, ‘Waste My Love’, is much slower and not as interesting. Not bad, but not mind-blowing either.

Saturday Night Special

Opening up with a relatively fast harmonized guitar lead, some busy bass lines and some tasty drum fills, we are led into a chorded section for the verse. The harmonized guitar lead pretty much acts as a short bridge into each verse. The pre-chorus’ and chorus’ are bloody catchy, like, really catchy and are the standout moments throughout the whole song.

The track pretty much takes the ‘verse, chorus, verse, chorus, bridge, verse, chorus’ structure with a few interesting variations thrown in, so there is no point in repeating my boring diatribe.

The solos are great, particularly the one at the end of the track, very rough and Ritchie Blackmore-like with some nice arpeggio work going on. At least for my money, this is one of the best NWOBHM tracks ever. 

Waste My Love

Greeted with a muted guitar melody and a chord progression we are then subject to some relatively catchy AOR/metal, I can’t really say too much about it. It’s obviously rocky but with a slightly ballad-y sensibility to it.  I’d say that the main riff becomes played out and a bit boring after a while, however the chorus’ save the track with some very strong vocals. Surprisingly, there are no guitar solos; however we do have some nice bass and vocal work towards the end. Overall, it’s nothing even remotely comparable to the A-side.

I'd definitely suggest this to fans of early punk, ‘real’ Heavy Metal, or just fans of AOR. If you're looking for heavy riffs, don't look here, but if you're looking for a catchy tune with great solos and a strong voice, I’d suggest you listen to it.

Edit 06/4/15: Thanks to High Treason for getting in touch! Check them out on their website http://high-treason.net/ as well as Facebook  http://www.facebook.com/hightreasonuk

Apparently High Treason are looking to re-record this monster jam and put a music video to it. After checking out a few tunes on their website, i'm excited to hear the results. These dudes can still tear it up after all these years!

Direct Download link

https://dl.dropbox.com/u/68280635/HT%20-%20SNSs.rar

Boneyard Metal Blog:

http://bm-80smetal.blogspot.co.uk/2014/01/high-treason-uk-saturday-night-special.html

Valentards

ahhhhh, Valentines day… possibly the worst holiday ever, I mean, who even bothers with it? Apparently many people do…. Fuck. Anyway, enjoy this playlist I made on ‘teh Utewbs’, nine songs of angsty, adolescent punk rock tunes.

http://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PL8ja20KunT4KrbgyqKF9vLQyhmlMyonmm&feature=mh_lolz

The A.G’s – I Hate Girls

Totally angsty 80’s/90’s punk in the vein of The Descendents. Unfortunately for them, they were a bit late to the party with their debut release ‘Bryans Car’ coming out in 1988 when ‘crossover’ was rampant and ‘post-hardcore/emo’ was pushing punk in new, exciting directions. This track is from their Cirkus Berzerkus record that come out sometime in 1990.

The A.G’s – I Get Rejected

More of the same juvenile ‘funnypunk’ from the 80’s, how can you not like this?

The Adolescents – Creatures

I HATE THEM ALL, CREATURES! With lyrics like that you can’t go wrong! Awesome early Californian punk rock/hardcore band.

The Adolescents – No Way

“No ass, no head, just go home and jack off instead” do I need to say any more?

Screeching Weasel – Pretty Girls Don’t Talk To Me

How can someone not like this? Yes it’s childish and angst-y, most good music is! Bugger off and go listen to Sting if you want ‘serious’ ‘adult’ music. I’ll take juvenile punk rock any day!

Agent Orange – No Such Thing

Fantastic ‘surf punk’ with some lyrics about love or rather how there’s ‘NO SUCH THING’. Ooooh angsty!

Sloppy Seconds – Germany

This seems like an earlier recorded version so it’s not as fast and melodic as the ‘Destroyed’ version. Still a blinding tune!

State Of Alert – Girl Problems

Phwoooooar! This. Is. HARDCORE. PUNK. Henry Rollins’ (then Garfield) previous band before he joined up with the mighty Black Flag!

Chixdiggit! – I Should Have Played Football In High School

Back to the 90’s with this pop-punk gem! I’m not sure if this is a sped up version, as can happen with tape rips, but I find this much better than the version on their ‘Best Hung Carrot… Demo’. Again, juvenile punk rock played by a load of dumpweeds. Get that stick out of your ass and embrace the retardo punk!

With all said and done, if you’re celebrating today, enjoy! If you’re sitting in your room like me, watching 80’s horror movies and listening to punk rock, high five! And enjoy the tunage.

Sloppy Seconds - Destroyed

Let’s start this off with a bang, Sloppy Seconds’ ‘Destroyed’!

First of all, the record cover. Awesome. For those who don’t get it, the title and cover are a reference to a little known band called KISS and their record ‘Destroyer’. Anyone? Anyone at all?

Musically, it’s not comparable to KISS at all. This is just straight punk rock, Ramones style with some rockabilly lead lines chucked in. If any of you like 77’ style punk or the melodic hardcore bands such as The Descendents, The Adolescents, The Faction, etc I would highly suggest you get on this.

Kicking off the record is the provocatively titled ‘I Don’t Wanna Be A Homosexual’ which opens with a funny sound clip, I have no idea what it’s from. After the first minute it cranks into a typical melodic punk track with great, hilarious lyrics and rockabilly ‘clean’ lead guitar lines sprinkled throughout. If this sounds weird to you, trust me, it works. The rhythm guitar plays memorable chord progressions and riffs, all played at a typical punk speed. This is a definite highlight of the record.

‘Come Back Traci’ is up next which is about the 80’s pornstar Traci Lords, as expected; the lyrics are hilarious and clever in a stupid way. Does that make sense? A much shorter track than the opener, Come Back Traci rips through in punk rock fashion with a great rock n roll style solo in the middle. Easily one of my favourites from this record.

‘Take You Home’ is the shortest track on the record at 1.24 minutes and is pretty much a punk rock cliché in the best way possible. Catchy verse, rock n roll solo, key change and chorus with lead lines till end. Great stuff.

‘Black Roses’ has a decidedly more Glam Rock guitar rhythm during the verses and a fantastic catchy straight up punky chorus. Great lyrics and a decent punk tune.

‘Runnin From The CIA’ is very Ramones-y going through the cliché punk rock chord progression with some nice twiddly rock n roll leads. Towards the end there is a sound clip of which, yet again, I can’t tell you what it’s from. Great goofy lyrics about being hounded by the CIA.

‘The Horror of Party Beach’ is a personal favourite of mine, horror lyrics mixed with beach party retardo lyrics.  Super catchy song with surfy guitar leads sprinkled throughout. Another sound clip exits the song which leads us to another favourite of mine…

‘Blackmail’ has the best lyrics of the whole record. Just a totally retarded, goofy punk rock tune about blackmailing people in different situations. If there is one track you should listen to on this record it is this, just funny as hell. Musically it’s pretty much standard punk rock, which is reason alone to listen to it!

‘So Fucked Up’ is my least favourite song on the record. I’m not one for lyrics about being proud of or glorifying drinking, taking drugs, etc unless it’s done in a comical way. Sloppy Seconds pull it off well enough in all their goony glory. Like the rest of the songs here, it’s just a straight punk rock tune with nice solos.

‘Germany’ took a couple listens to get into but now it’s one of my favourites. It’s about getting cheated on by your girlfriend, splitting-up, and then going to Germany to shag sluts. Great stuff! As expected from these guys, it’s another punk rock tune with great lyrics.

‘Janie Is A Nazi’ is another one of my favourites. It’s a goofy track about a girl who becomes a Nazi to the displeasure of our singer. Obviously hilarious lyrics and the inclusion of cowbell and a one note solo is nice! Just catchy as hell, get on it, NOW.

‘I Want ‘Em Dead’ opens up with another sound clip which lasts for a minute until we are hit with a great riff and then a doo-wop chord progression. Funny lyrics about killing random people, what’s not to like about it? An awesome doo-wop style bridge comes in and we end with the chorus. Super catchy verses and chorus’ as expected from these goofballs, another one of my favourites. How many times have I said that now?

‘If I Had A Woman’ is a decent track, pretty much mid-paced punk rock with relatively catchy verses and chorus’. As far as I can tell it’s a song about wanting to have a woman so he can ignore, annoy, refuse, among other things, which in turn, makes him satisfied. Great stuff!

‘Veronica’, much like the last track isn’t as memorable as the previous tracks. Some decent goofy lyrics about a girlfriend who commits suicide and our singer misses her, “but not enough to cry!” It’s pretty much another rock n roll tinged punk tune.

‘The Candy Man’ is a decent cover in goofy, sloppy, punk rock fashion. Some ridiculous, funny, pitch-shifted vocals do some back-up’s throughout. Not bad but not mind-blowing either.

‘Steal Your Beer’ is a decent retardo punk track about coming into town, fucking your daughter, wrecking your home, eating your food and stealing your beer, among some other shenanigans! Like I said before, I’m not big of these types of lyrics but Sloppy Seconds pull it off.

‘Time Bomb’ is the last track, it’s a decent punk rock track with nice back-up vocals that remind me of ‘Give ‘em Enough Rope’ era Clash. These last four tracks kind of let the record down, not that they are bad songs, but when compared to ‘I Don’t Wanna Be A Homosexual’, ‘Come Back Traci’, ‘Blackmail’, ‘Germany’, ‘Janie Is a Nazi’, and so on, they just don’t seem to stack up.

Overall, Sloppy Seconds offer us a blinder of an album packed full of great melodies, chord progressions and leads as well as giving us some of the greatest ‘silly’ lyrics ever written. If it wasn’t for those last few tracks this would be an ‘all-killer, no filler’ deal. I’d definitely suggest you listen to this if you like punk rock, have a sense of humour and don’t take things too seriously. If you were wondering about their other recorded material, this is by far the best stuff. The other records don’t have the overly snotty vocals, rockabilly leads and catchy melodies that this masterpiece has.

Download is below and it’s the 20^th Anniversary Edition with even more tracks! Goddamn, I better hurry over to download it myself!

Direct Download

http://www.sendspace.com/file/nflxt8

Dr Drunk Blog: Grab the other Sloppy records!

http://drdrunkruinsitforeveryone.blogspot.co.uk/2013/12/sloppy-seconds-re-upped.html

Snow Delay At The Frankfurt School

                                               Hallo Thar!

This blog will mostly be concerned with reviewing music as well as offering download links. Most posts will be of punk or punk influenced bands but there will be some exceptions! For the time being I will direct you to files uploaded by other bloggers. Eventually, when I sort out how to use Mediafire I will upload some oddities I've acquired over the years.

"like anywhere else there are no coincidences, probability makes for accomplices and change creates meaning."  

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